I was waken up by a call...i felt very weird...

i wish at this moment...
when i open my eyes, i was in my own bedroom...
when i open my door, i could see my papa, mammy, guama, koko n sharone...
i could see my 2 big black n a white dogs running, chasing around the house...
i wish i can see all this...

i wish i can go out together with my family in a car...

心中有股莫名其妙的感觉由心而上。。。

i wish i could play back to 2 years ago that i was still in m'sia, i had thought to have credit transfer, i din want to leave actually...i m quite regreted that i din take the action...regreted that i din discuss about it with them...

2 years ago...i wish i was in 2 years ago...

today i made up my mind to buy the cake in woolly...

wandering in rundle...wandering around...jus feel like wandering...
walking in woolly...rundle...dunno what m i doing...dunno what my mind thinking of...
feel weird...i was physically walking but dunno where my mind was...
finally grabbing a cake...

Y?
worried?confused?uncertain..
i know i shouldn't be thinking too much cos i can't do anything even though i keep thinking...
thinking of what?!

the bandage

a credit to my pig friend...wang zhu ying...
thanks for making the bandage for me...asking u to move my name around...cutting the best angel from the pic...(ps: she even cut off my head, leaving my butt in the bandage and said that is nice...*-* =.=") after making changes a few times...i chose the very 1st design she made...wakakka...making her changing and sending the pic meaningless...

this time, i choose to put...
我的秘密花园
means my secret garden...

a place to store my memory...express my thought...my feeling...n...myself
a palce that i won't bluff myself...a real heart of myself....
and also a place to entertain myself....

(i've attached quite a lot to it this recently....it's good or bad?)

journey to peace

'i'm an angel of peace. i bring u tranquility. you ll have a smoother route.'

the guest lec gave us a small game after the class. i got the card of Shanti, means peace.


i m in a jungle. a pathway in front of me. i follow it. there is a sign board showing where i m going. this pathway gives me everything that i want according to my thought. i m enjoying, a lot of fun. i m indulged....

i m tripped over. everything has gone in front of me. i try to caught it but it's abandoned me. i m panic and don't know what to do. i couldn't get up. i hear a sound, a very light sound 'stand up...be strong...' i stand up and look around but nothing around me. i m lost...

i see a light. i follow it. the pathway is not placed nicely for me. i have to find my way. i can't see anythings. things doesn't happen as what i thought. i take my step bravely. i walk slowly, very slowly...

i don't know what the light will bring me to,
i wonder what will happen to me for every step that i take,
i take away my worries,
i m just walking....

what is the colour of your sky?

if the sky is blue,
because i'm day-dreaming.

if the sky is red,
because i'm angry.

if the sky is yellow,
because i'm recalling the past.

if the sky is purple,
because i'm frustrated

if the sky is grey,
because i'm worried

if the sky if grey blue,
because i'm sad

if i were blind,
my sky will be colourful,
because nothing is more important than my feeling.

(translated from -@@-MITE*SEEING-@@-)

so...
what is the colour of ur sky?
mine is colourless...
i try to let go everything, stop thinking and worry of anything...
i m trying...cos i m tired...

communication

it's a gap or misunderstanding?

maybe i should change my attitude of not liking to explain things...

mum always complains that we dun lik to say things clearly...
maybe this is the problem...
the inheritance of TANNNN.....

but y m i always in the middle???

草

原来外面真的还有很多芳草
可是我眼里

就只有那一根


既不能茁壮成长，又不能连根拔起
就让它慢慢枯萎吧。。。

我再也不想为它浇水施肥了。。。

只希望你关心我多一点

空虚

吃过，喝过，玩过，乐过，颠过，疯过。。。

我。。。
到底在干嘛。。。







5354

缘

生命是一种缘

能够相知相识，
是一种令人珍惜难忘的缘。

人潮中擦肩而过的行人，
屋檐下同时避雨的路人，
旅途中同乘一车的旅人，
都是有缘人。

雨滴打在额头上是缘，
落叶飘留在胳膊上是缘。

鸟儿在天空中相遇，也是因为有缘。

不是每个人都拥有缘， 也不是每个寻觅的人都可以抓住缘。
或是有缘， 或是无缘。

人生中有太多的不可知，
一个念头， 一个决定，
便能抓住或错过一份缘。

选择了爱是因为缘，选择了不爱也是因为缘。
生命是如此，生活亦如此。

缘份是天注定，
有缘才能相见，相逢，相识，相知，
只等待缘的到来，却不去追求与抓住，还有这份的存在吗？

人是随缘来到这世上，
老师，同学，邻居，同时，像走马灯在眼前流动，
随缘而聚，随缘而散。
有的你把握了成为你的好友，知己或情人，
但更多的却只能与你擦肩而过，很快的就走出了你的视野，成为路人。

缘，在生命中邂逅，又在生命中流失。

facebook Vs blog

Facebook?
Ya. This is my facebook...
think everyone should b very familiar with it...
almost everyone owes it...even some of my friends' parents have it too...
it is not a new thing...it has been out for 3 or 4 yrs...i think so...i knew it 3 years ago...
it is just another website for making friends...a replacement for friendster somebody would say that

ya...as what i have said i've known it 3 years ago and owed an a/c but never done anything...
i m more active there since this year...
having contact back with some of my long lost friends...knowing what they are doing now via their statuses, activities or even photos in their facebook...

some ppl even play games there...
me?
hohoho...
Happy Farm...this is the only game i play with
y? because this is the easier game that doesn't involve many ppl, doesn't take so many quota, doens't need to use brain...i would say...just do everything with clicking...
here, this is my farm...still got 1h 11min to go for my pumpkin to mature...hohoho~

the first thing i do every morning n before bed is to check on my farm...feel very stupid but yet i still do it...sigh~

the most interesting will be the comments...
it is just like connecting everyone together even u r far far away...
just typing whatever u feel like saying to the status or photo or anything...
the person at the next corner will know it...
their notification is so instant...

facebook...it is so IN that it can even using mobile to login...
checking 24/7...
u can get into whenever u r shopping, eating, playing, sleeping or even in the toilet...
a friend of mine saying that this is his own world...
huh?
what do u mean that?
...........
...........
...........
own world?
ya...maybe it is so true...everyone needs their own small world...
to me...www.stories-zoe.blogspot.com...is my own world
A small world of mine that i can write anything that i like here

a new blog...
我的小小天地
My Small Small World~~~

陌生人

曾是两个很熟悉的人，却变得很陌生。。。
见面宛如不相识。。。
两条平行线，没有交集。。。

你曾经让我习惯了你的存在。。。
现在你却对我置之不理。。。

似相近，却很远。。。

沈思

与其为未来的怀疑与否定，还不如活在当下，把握现在，活出自我。

down-regulation

‘Zoe,你还是那样子没变到。’有人在一个生日派队上这样对我说。

是真的吗？

这几天心情都很低落。

哭泣的感觉一直都由心而上。

今天，终于压抑不了了。

我，哭了。。。

想过一人到pub里去。。。

曾有几次的冲动，想买酒把自己灌醉。

醉了的感觉是如何的？

我曾告诉过自己不把不高兴的东西写上去，但我今天破例了。

明天，我还可以有灿烂的笑容吗？

Autism

Being lonely?
going anywhere alone...
eating alone...

Nobody cares if u go toilet without locking or even closing the door
Nobody cares if the living hall n kitcken r messy
Nobody cares if ur stuff is scattered everywhere
Nobody cares if u on the volume to the max
Nobody cares if u dun wash dishes
Nobody cares if u r naked in the house
Nobody cares if u r screaming
Nobody cares if u go home late
Nobody cares when do u eat, how many meal a day, even dun eat

Never expect the noice is from the other room
Never expect the door ll open if u hear some noice from outside
Never expect there is somebody else when u open the door

it ll be very scary if these happen...

烦恼？微笑？

今天本想提起精神开始读书。可是就不知为何却很失落。找了几个朋友谈，但发觉他们很忙只有我不知在干嘛。。。

无意间我在电话找到一则短讯，这是去年朋友给我的生日祝贺。。。

人生本来就很多疑惑；
不管经过多少失落；
阳光日出明天依旧等候；
闭着眼不想现实有多无奈；
今天不想昨天的事；
把快乐的心情放在每一天；
用微笑忘掉烦恼。

：）

stay or leave

温室里的花朵？

闲到怕

时常听到人在怨时间不够用，但你有听过人家说得空到怕吗？我就是。
时常都在闲晃，不知在干嘛。。。

事业？兴趣？
人最可悲的是不知要干嘛。。。

不写了，再写会越来越emo...
这是我到这后认识的字。

不安担忧

我知道这是急不来的,'你'告诉我,我会在今年里,过年前得到答案....
但是这会是好消息吗???

我以很忙来麻醉自己,分散注意力,告诉自己别想太多
实际上我在忙啥,我自己也不知...

时间一天一天过去,也越来越逼近...
我的担忧也因而提升...